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Side Effects of Restriction: Why I Take More Food Than I Can Eat
For the longest time, I couldn't understand why I wanted to eat everything in sight or nothing at all. I couldn't just eat one cookie. In fact, I didn't even want just one cookie. I wanted the whole tray. I knew I wouldn't and couldn't eat the whole tray (even during...
Why Eating Disorders Make It Hard to Eat with People
When I was anorexic, I hated eating out. I was always torn between either spending time with my friends or staying in my room. It wasn't uncommon for my roommate to suggest we grab Mexican food between classes, or for a group of my friends to gather at Olive Garden on...
Eating Disorders, Body Image, Finding Health
Confession time! I had a bit of a weight pity-party this weekend. My self-doubt and body-image frustrations were revitalized on Saturday night around 9:30pm as I scrolled through the news on my phone and saw an article about Meghan Markle and her royal wedding. See, I...
Stop Talking About Sugar Fasts, Fad Diets, and Juice Cleanses
For as long as I can remember, I saw myself as fat. Yes, I was a bit chubby when I was 8 and 9 years old (I later grew out of my baby fat when I hit my growth spurt), but I was nowhere close to unhealthy or fat. Nonetheless, fat was my nickname. I was called fat by my...
My Motivational Yo-Yo

My Motivational Yo-Yo

I want to recover from my eating disorder! No I don't. Yes I do. No I don't. Oh bother... Is it just me, or does your...

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You Should Eat A Variety Of Foods | Breaking the Restrict-Binge Cycle
When I was at university and struggling with anorexia, my diet was very...homogeneous. It was uninteresting and typically the same every day. I would eat a bowl of raw oatmeal with fruit for breakfast and a salad for lunch. Every now and then, I would have a small...
Stop Talking About Sugar Fasts, Fad Diets, and Juice Cleanses
For as long as I can remember, I saw myself as fat. Yes, I was a bit chubby when I was 8 and 9 years old (I later grew out of my baby fat when I hit my growth spurt), but I was nowhere close to unhealthy or fat. Nonetheless, fat was my nickname. I was called fat by my...
Happiness Project Update | ED Recovery Style
I spent a week asking: "What would make me happy right now?" (See my last post to find out what prompted this journey.) What a selfish attitude, right? That's what I used to think. But I've come to realize that self-care isn't selfish and choosing to do things that...
Side Effects of Restriction: Why I Take More Food Than I Can Eat
For the longest time, I couldn't understand why I wanted to eat everything in sight or nothing at all. I couldn't just eat one cookie. In fact, I didn't even want just one cookie. I wanted the whole tray. I knew I wouldn't and couldn't eat the whole tray (even during...
Setting New Goals In Recovery

Setting New Goals In Recovery

Yesterday was not great, to say the least. First, I have been restricting in ways I shouldn't for the past couple of weeks. Everything came to a head yesterday afternoon. I was starving and no one was in the house, so I binged. I ate and ate and ate. It was my first...

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